WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.696 --> 00:00:01.906 >> My name is Patti Clay. 2 00:00:02.166 --> 00:00:10.646 I'm a mom, a sister, a daughter, colleague, employer, supervisor. 3 00:00:11.276 --> 00:00:20.716 Who when I was around 23 started with a disability. 4 00:00:21.236 --> 00:00:22.536 By the time I was 5 00:00:22.536 --> 00:00:26.936 about mid-thirties started using a wheelchair. 6 00:00:27.246 --> 00:00:29.086 >> Patti Clay is the bureau chief 7 00:00:29.086 --> 00:00:31.256 of the Community Living Division for the state 8 00:00:31.256 --> 00:00:35.176 of Connecticut's Department of Rehabilitation Services. 9 00:00:35.496 --> 00:00:44.366 >> Work also has benefits of offering an opportunity for me 10 00:00:44.436 --> 00:00:50.246 to show what I can do. 11 00:00:51.056 --> 00:00:54.936 It's very, it becomes very difficult 12 00:00:55.426 --> 00:01:03.436 when the social messages that you get all the time 13 00:01:03.636 --> 00:01:07.816 from various places, are that you don't have a lot of value. 14 00:01:08.436 --> 00:01:11.716 That -- well look at you, what can you do? 15 00:01:12.256 --> 00:01:15.206 I mean, I've had people say that directly to me. 16 00:01:15.726 --> 00:01:20.366 Work provides me the opportunity to at least demonstrate 17 00:01:21.306 --> 00:01:24.146 that I can do something other than what people expect. 18 00:01:24.986 --> 00:01:27.736 And I enjoy it. 19 00:01:27.896 --> 00:01:30.816 >> Patti says everyone has a different understanding 20 00:01:30.816 --> 00:01:34.036 of disability, however assumptions can 21 00:01:34.036 --> 00:01:34.966 be discriminating. 22 00:01:35.436 --> 00:01:38.556 For instance, a few comments she has gotten. 23 00:01:38.756 --> 00:01:40.736 >> Gee, do you think you can do that job? 24 00:01:41.076 --> 00:01:43.796 That's a pretty stressful job, you know. 25 00:01:44.146 --> 00:01:45.386 Pretty big job. 26 00:01:45.926 --> 00:01:53.676 I guess I am more shocked by the people even in this building, 27 00:01:53.676 --> 00:01:57.956 many of whom I've worked around for a very long time 28 00:01:58.476 --> 00:02:02.346 who will ask me questions like; 29 00:02:03.116 --> 00:02:05.756 "How many hours a day do you work?" 30 00:02:06.316 --> 00:02:08.676 I'm like, "Which job? 31 00:02:09.076 --> 00:02:13.476 This one or the one I do to moonlight and teach online 32 00:02:13.476 --> 00:02:16.736 at a graduate program, you know, at a college?" 33 00:02:17.156 --> 00:02:20.436 >> Patti struggles with work life balance like everyone else, 34 00:02:20.706 --> 00:02:24.396 including in the areas of times she works, relationships 35 00:02:24.396 --> 00:02:27.536 with family and friends and leisure activities. 36 00:02:28.026 --> 00:02:35.326 >> Truthfully, I don't think I keep them in balance. 37 00:02:35.326 --> 00:02:43.146 Work probably dominants because it's work and wages 38 00:02:43.666 --> 00:02:45.196 that allow me to do other things. 39 00:02:45.806 --> 00:02:50.196 Family is wonderful, but I have a very small family. 40 00:02:50.836 --> 00:02:57.766 And they're far flung so we don't get together a lot. 41 00:02:58.516 --> 00:03:04.906 I felt very strongly about the fact that family is family, 42 00:03:05.476 --> 00:03:06.556 they're not my caregivers. 43 00:03:07.296 --> 00:03:08.496 Because I don't drive 44 00:03:09.246 --> 00:03:12.986 and because I may require some help while I'm 45 00:03:13.076 --> 00:03:16.986 out with someone I think that's intimidating for people. 46 00:03:17.616 --> 00:03:22.476 And, not everybody feels up to that. 47 00:03:22.476 --> 00:03:23.736 And I get that, you know. 48 00:03:24.246 --> 00:03:27.626 But it does limit friendships a good deal. 49 00:03:30.416 --> 00:03:33.656 It's the rare person who makes the effort 50 00:03:34.056 --> 00:03:40.796 to go the extra mile, to be a friend. 51 00:03:40.796 --> 00:03:47.986 So, on my end of that I try to make sure that I do ask people 52 00:03:47.986 --> 00:03:51.546 to do things, to go out and do things. 53 00:03:52.106 --> 00:03:56.736 I try to do it in a way that it's most convenient for them. 54 00:03:56.956 --> 00:03:58.936 I want to do what everybody else does. 55 00:03:59.566 --> 00:04:03.626 I want to go hiking. 56 00:04:03.866 --> 00:04:05.966 I like to soar in a glider plane. 57 00:04:06.846 --> 00:04:08.296 I like to go out on a boat. 58 00:04:08.816 --> 00:04:10.646 I like to sail. 59 00:04:11.216 --> 00:04:16.286 You know, any of those kinds of things. 60 00:04:16.286 --> 00:04:18.096 Don't assume that I wouldn't want to do it 61 00:04:18.096 --> 00:04:20.766 or it's not doable, because I've done all of it. 62 00:04:21.596 --> 00:04:23.666 You just have to figure out how to do it. 63 00:04:24.156 --> 00:04:27.816 >> Patti is retiring in the Fall of 2017.