WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.456 --> 00:00:03.256 >> Meeting Siu Cheng, most people wouldn't guess 2 00:00:03.486 --> 00:00:05.006 that she has a disability. 3 00:00:05.326 --> 00:00:10.136 It's non-obvious, as is the case for about 70% 4 00:00:10.136 --> 00:00:12.596 of individuals with disabilities. 5 00:00:12.836 --> 00:00:15.476 >> Put a smile on my face, and people are like -- 6 00:00:16.596 --> 00:00:19.436 are totally shocked when I tell them, oh, yeah, I do. 7 00:00:19.436 --> 00:00:22.126 I suffer from depression, and they're like no, way. 8 00:00:22.676 --> 00:00:25.276 You don't seem like one. 9 00:00:25.276 --> 00:00:27.066 You don't seem like a person with one. 10 00:00:27.066 --> 00:00:30.596 And I'm like, oh, okay, so I'm supposed to come to work 11 00:00:30.886 --> 00:00:33.576 with a frown on my face dressed like goth? 12 00:00:33.576 --> 00:00:35.356 I'm like, if that was the case, 13 00:00:35.846 --> 00:00:38.066 I think I would've been booted off the job are ready. 14 00:00:38.066 --> 00:00:39.696 I wouldn't be an office manager. 15 00:00:39.696 --> 00:00:41.356 I would be probably just an intern. 16 00:00:41.416 --> 00:00:44.286 >> One of the challenges that Siu faces in work and life 17 00:00:44.286 --> 00:00:47.816 in general is hanging onto her authentic self, 18 00:00:48.456 --> 00:00:51.246 rather than putting a so-called mask. 19 00:00:51.516 --> 00:00:57.716 >> For someone who suffers from depression, I feel like it's 20 00:00:58.376 --> 00:01:02.496 like you're living in your own isolated world in a black box. 21 00:01:03.036 --> 00:01:05.726 No one can see you, and you can't see yourself either. 22 00:01:05.876 --> 00:01:08.816 You know, just keeping emotions in check, 23 00:01:08.876 --> 00:01:11.966 I think that's the hardest part, because when you go to work, 24 00:01:12.026 --> 00:01:17.766 you're supposed to give off this - you're a positive individual 25 00:01:17.796 --> 00:01:21.396 at all times, even if you're having a crappy day at home 26 00:01:21.806 --> 00:01:24.196 or a crappy day in your own personal life. 27 00:01:24.946 --> 00:01:28.816 And that has been probably the hardest thing for me to do. 28 00:01:29.166 --> 00:01:30.266 Is it working for me? 29 00:01:31.456 --> 00:01:33.126 At times, At times. 30 00:01:33.736 --> 00:01:39.706 I say that because it's easier to pretend or play pretend 31 00:01:40.096 --> 00:01:43.236 at work than to let strangers know what's going 32 00:01:43.236 --> 00:01:43.866 on in your life. 33 00:01:44.546 --> 00:01:49.556 But at home, it's like, you know, your family members 34 00:01:49.556 --> 00:01:51.466 or your close friends see the real you. 35 00:01:51.636 --> 00:01:55.686 My son understands and accepted the fact 36 00:01:55.716 --> 00:01:57.056 that I do have depression. 37 00:01:57.696 --> 00:02:00.946 So when I do have my episodes of extremely sad, 38 00:02:01.666 --> 00:02:03.816 and he knows it, he'll come over. 39 00:02:03.876 --> 00:02:05.786 He'll give me a hug. 40 00:02:06.836 --> 00:02:08.516 He'll basically treat it like as 41 00:02:08.546 --> 00:02:10.906 if I was home sick with a cold or flu. 42 00:02:11.256 --> 00:02:12.256 He'll make me soup. 43 00:02:12.256 --> 00:02:16.386 He'll take care of me, and he knows those are the times 44 00:02:16.426 --> 00:02:23.296 that mommy is not capable of holding a regular conversation. 45 00:02:23.566 --> 00:02:26.226 >> One way Sui keeps a balance between work and the rest 46 00:02:26.226 --> 00:02:30.076 of life is by taking time for interaction at lunch. 47 00:02:30.176 --> 00:02:31.856 >> One thing I know, it so far has worked, 48 00:02:31.856 --> 00:02:35.306 is that I've schedule lunch on my own calendar, 49 00:02:35.586 --> 00:02:37.636 and I make sure I stick to it, 50 00:02:37.636 --> 00:02:39.986 and I don't like to eat lunch by myself. 51 00:02:39.986 --> 00:02:46.046 I tend to -- when I eat lunch by myself, I tend to get 52 00:02:46.046 --> 00:02:49.956 into depressing thoughts, and so I start to, 53 00:02:50.386 --> 00:02:53.326 around 12 o'clock noon, I will call all my coworkers. 54 00:02:53.636 --> 00:02:54.376 Hey, are you free? 55 00:02:54.376 --> 00:02:55.096 Hey, are you free? 56 00:02:55.096 --> 00:02:57.826 And I keep on asking until someone says, yes, I'm free. 57 00:02:58.086 --> 00:02:59.886 And I'll say, all right, great, let's go. 58 00:03:00.306 --> 00:03:04.466 You know, I find that if I find at least one person to go with, 59 00:03:04.966 --> 00:03:06.326 I know my day's going to get better. 60 00:03:06.356 --> 00:03:09.166 >> In addition to the emotional and physical challenges 61 00:03:09.166 --> 00:03:11.626 that disability plays in people's lives, 62 00:03:11.956 --> 00:03:14.156 culture can also be a factor. 63 00:03:14.916 --> 00:03:17.036 >> Family-wise, honestly, to tell you, 64 00:03:17.186 --> 00:03:20.966 I don't have a strong family support. 65 00:03:21.866 --> 00:03:26.076 Part of it is that mental health is not discussed 66 00:03:26.796 --> 00:03:27.816 at the family table. 67 00:03:28.436 --> 00:03:31.716 In my particular culture, mental health don't exist. 68 00:03:32.836 --> 00:03:37.346 Or I should say, any type of disability are not discussed. 69 00:03:37.346 --> 00:03:40.516 >> Sui does try to balance work and family responsibilities 70 00:03:40.516 --> 00:03:42.946 by taking at least a little time for herself, 71 00:03:43.356 --> 00:03:47.136 like when she watches television shows, including Criminal Minds. 72 00:03:47.566 --> 00:03:49.896 She also says one day, she would be interested 73 00:03:49.896 --> 00:03:52.246 in getting an animal, which can be sensitive 74 00:03:52.306 --> 00:03:54.836 to people's emotional and physical needs. 75 00:03:55.246 --> 00:03:57.956 >> When I go to my mom's house, we have a family dog, 76 00:03:58.026 --> 00:04:05.066 and she just knows that when I am just having a bad day. 77 00:04:06.266 --> 00:04:10.086 You know, and I don't even know how animals can do that. 78 00:04:10.786 --> 00:04:13.406 You know, like we don't even speak the same language. 79 00:04:13.566 --> 00:04:16.226 Half the time, they don't even do what we're saying, but yet, 80 00:04:16.516 --> 00:04:20.926 they just have a sense to pick up on our emotions, 81 00:04:21.366 --> 00:04:23.056 and I really, really like that.